How to quickly divorce your husband if you have a child - where to start divorcing your husband if you have children

Unfortunately, filing a divorce has become the same everyday matter as getting married.

People try to live together, but sometimes it’s better to disperse painlessly, so as not to injure each other and build your relationship with someone else.

Even more significant circumstances leading to a breakup are if a woman or man lives with a tyrant. Do not be surprised, because tyranny is a concept that has no gender. Both men and women can be equally dangerous. Although for a girl, due to her physical fragility, it is much more difficult to withstand beatings or something like that.

If you agree

If the spouses decide to divorce by mutual desire, there are fewer problems. But in any case, it is necessary to agree on some issues that will help clarify how the couple will live further:

• If you have children, you need to decide with whom they will live. Usually with mom, but dad can see them. We will have to calmly think about how to make these meetings convenient for both, but also for the children not to suffer;
• It is required to collect a package of necessary documents;
• It wouldn't hurt to consult a lawyer to find out how much of the property will go to whom. This question creates many problems, since no one wants to give away what they have acquired. This is especially true for marriages with children, where most of the property of the divorcing couple goes to the spouse with whom the child remains.

When the issues have been discussed and everything has become more or less clear, it is time to contact the divorce authorities. Help for a couple to divorce is:

Civil registry office (documents, procedure, deadlines, cost)

When dissolving a marriage, if all parties agree, you can simply go to the registry office and collect a small list of standard documentation. But you should remember that this option will work if there are no children. So here are the documents:

• Application (its form will be issued at the registry office). Each of the couple must write;
• Passports of each of the couple;
• Marriage certificate;
• Receipt for payment of state duty.

The amount of state duty that future ex-spouses must pay is 650 rubles for 2017. After all the above documents are ready and sent to the registry office, you need to wait thirty days. This period is given to the couple to change their minds. You can withdraw the application during this period at any time, but after its expiration you will be officially divorced.

Magistrates' Court (documents, procedure, terms, cost)

If the spouses decide to divorce, but have disagreements, you should go to court. In this case, the procedure is more complicated, since this option is provided for couples who have something to share.

For example, in order to competently prepare for a divorce, you need to understand that here we are considering cases of couples with children, with common property that the spouses cannot divide.

But keep in mind that you won’t be able to quickly divorce your husband here - sometimes the processes drag on for a long time.

Here are the documents that will definitely be needed in court:

• First of all, to get a divorce, you will need a statement of claim. Describe the reasons why you want to get a divorce, what circumstances prompted you to do this. The main thing is to compose it correctly, since a lot depends on it. The claim must indicate the number of children from the marriage;
• Attach copies of the children's birth certificate;
• When collecting documents for divorce, you must bring a marriage certificate, making several copies of it;
• In addition, the list may contain documents indicating the place of residence of each spouse. A certificate from the HOA is suitable for this purpose;
• A receipt for payment of the state duty, which, as in the previous case, is 600 rubles. Attach a check from Sberbank to the claim. If you do not do this, your documents will not be accepted in court;
• You can represent your interests in court on your own, or by seeking the help of a lawyer or lawyer and issuing a power of attorney for him. But services of this kind must be paid for during a divorce, which increases the amount of expenses several times depending on the complexity of the process.

But this is not all the documents. If you have property, the court may ask you to submit an agreement on its division. Therefore, be prepared that the court may request other documents that will be required in order to file a divorce from your husband.

If against (district court)

If divorcing spouses cannot come to some common opinion regarding the divorce, then do not be upset. Husband or wife don't want to divorce? In this case, you can take several steps that will allow you to get out of the situation with minimal casualties. Try the following steps:

• First of all, we need to try again to come to an agreement with the other side. Convince your spouse that if the marriage cannot survive, there is no need to sit on a sinking boat;

• Arguments don't help? In this case, there is only one way to get a divorce quickly - go to the district court. But there is a condition: the court must be at the place of registration of the party resisting the divorce. This can be done even without his knowledge, although if you are choosing how to divorce your husband without a scandal, then this is clearly not the way;
• Prepare for the fact that the claim may not be accepted the first time, and it will take time to consider it. But use this break to make the case for the impossibility of your marriage even stronger. In particular, such evidence may include facts of betrayal of a spouse, drunkenness, frequent quarrels, etc. In general, everything that proves that the husband is a despot or the woman simply cannot live with him;
• It is advisable to attract witnesses who can testify that the spouses cannot live together, even if one of them does not want to file for divorce;
• You can get a divorce without the consent of your spouse if he is in prison or is incapacitated;
• But if a couple has children, then it is necessary to file for divorce in court in any case. It is in court that the further place of residence of the child will be determined.

Despite the fact that children are often given to their mothers, a divorce from the husband may result in the child remaining with the father if he can prove that the children will be better off with him.

Statement of claim

When figuring out where to start a divorce in court, the first thing you need to do is write a statement of claim. This is practically the main document that needs to be brought to court. The statement of claim must be drawn up in accordance with the judicial practice of the Supreme Court of the Russian Federation and the norms of the Civil Procedure Code. A claim must be filed in court only in writing.

It is worth saying that this is not the most reliable way to quickly divorce your husband. Such cases are considered by district judges, which means that the claim will take a long time to be considered. You can see what a claim looks like on the court information stand, and there are many examples on the Internet. But the only thing you need to know when drawing up a statement of claim is what information it should contain:

• State your position in as much detail and accuracy as possible, which became the reason for saying the cherished words “Let's get a divorce”;
• Discuss how you want the common property to be divided. The material issue is one of the most pressing in the divorce process;
• Indicate your wishes regarding who the children should stay with;
• What financial support will come from the other parent.

The claim must be drawn up in several copies so that one copy remains with the parties to the proceedings and in court.

Documentation

1. Statement of claim.
2. Marriage certificate.
3. If there are children in a marriage, the birth certificates of each one must be attached to the case, but only those born in this particular marriage.

4. If there is, then you can attach a marriage contract, an agreement between the spouses regarding who the children will stay with, or who will own what property after the divorce.
5. If a representative will appear in the court where you are submitting documents, then a notarized power of attorney must be attached to the list of papers.

6. When a divorce occurs in court due to disputes over property, it needs to be appraised.
7. Certificate of family composition.
8. If the issue of alimony is being considered, you need to collect documents showing the defendant’s income.
9. Receipt for payment of state duty - 650 rubles.

Timing and cost

The procedure is lengthy. The first meeting will be held after a month of consideration of the case. So, after saying “I’m getting a divorce” to each other, be prepared to wait. And if the court decides that the couple can still survive the crisis, then she will suggest waiting about three months.

The cost of a divorce can reach a colossal amount. But if you don’t hire expensive lawyers and defend your interests yourself, then you can invest in the amount of the state duty. But rarely is anyone not afraid to be in court themselves, and therefore they trust a good lawyer more.

Children and property

Children remain with the spouse who can provide the child with more comfortable living conditions. If the child is over 10 years old, his desire to stay with his mother or father may be taken into account.

But the property does not manifest its will and then the issue of its division must be resolved through the court, if a prenuptial agreement has not been signed earlier. The court considers the case step by step:

• The property of each spouse is established;
• Definition of share;
• From the general list, each party indicates which items they want to take for themselves;
• The amount of compensation if the thing went to one person (unequal division of indivisible things).

If children remain with one spouse, his share of the property increases. But only if the spouse manages to justify it.

Certificate

It is advisable not to start looking for papers that were issued in court before going to the registry office, but to prepare them in advance in a separate folder. After all, they will be needed to pick up the divorce certificate.

After the divorce has been recognized in court, the property claims have been sorted out, and the children have been settled, go to the registry office (the one where you signed). There, take the treasured piece of paper right now. And if we have already told you how to divorce your husband, then not everyone knows how to pick up divorce papers. And this can be done if you present the court decision to the registry office employees.

Pay the state fee and show your passport. You may also need to show your marriage certificate. At the end, they will put a stamp in your passport stating that the marriage has been dissolved.

“There are three good reasons for divorce”: a psychologist explains when it’s time to separate

Divorce is a painful matter. Internal vacillation over whether to end the relationship or try to save something can lead to a nervous breakdown. How do you understand that the time has come to take a serious step? Psychologist Tatyana Sharanda told us about this.

Tatyana Sharanda practical psychologist, family and marriage consultant

head of the psychological development center

The realization of being abandoned is difficult for both women and men

— It is generally accepted that women experience divorce more difficult, is this true?

— It is very difficult to say that divorce is harder for someone, men or women. Firstly, it all depends on the situation, and secondly, on the personal qualities of each person.

Of course, if we talk about general statistics, women are more sensitive by nature, but still the main factor is who left whom. There is almost always someone who has been abandoned. It's usually harder for him.

The person who leaves is a priori stronger. The psychological pressure on the abandoned person can be extremely strong. Sometimes even men cannot cope with such situations.

Moreover, they often seek salvation in alcohol, gambling, and so on.

- But it also happens that the decision is made mutually. The ending is not always tragic.

- Certainly. There are such couples, and I have deep respect for them. Unfortunately, not everyone can come to an agreement. Good relationships between former spouses are rarely maintained. But people came to me who, despite the divorce, are still friends. And at the reception they were about problems with their common child.

For example, one baby showed psychological difficulties, and both parents were interested in holding him and helping him understand himself. This is a wonderful example to others.  

Divorce, get married, get divorced again, get married again

— They say that if one of the spouses has the idea of ​​divorce in principle, then there is no turning back. Sooner or later there will be a break.

- And here we cannot say for sure. Situations vary. It depends on what roles each person plays within the family, which inner self dominates.

There are couples where both he and she are teenagers within themselves, regardless of their real age. In this case, everything is unpredictable, because for them the relationship is rather a game. In words, spouses get divorced almost every day. Gradually, even those around them get used to their scandals.

There are times when people actually get divorced. Then they get married again. Then they get divorced again and... get married (laughs). This is their personal journey of growing up. Often in such marriages the child takes on the role of the adult. Paradoxical but true! He is the most responsible and wise in the house.

He had to become like this in order to at least survive.  

A marriage where one of the partners plays the role of a parent can last quite a long time, since a mature person understands a lot, is not afraid to take responsibility and knows how to give in.

There are unions where the husband and wife are both independent individuals, both adults. In this case, the reason for divorce is usually very serious, for example, a discrepancy between the sexual constitution.

When one of the partners is hyperactive, and the other is much less interested in the intimate side of life.

Or someone has not just a fleeting relationship on the side, but a strong attachment that gradually develops into true love, and being together is simply unbearable.

Society no longer blames a wife who leaves the family

— Based on your experience, who most often initiates divorce?

— You might be surprised: today these are more and more often women! They can provide for themselves financially, their parents help them, they have ambitions, personal goals, society no longer blames a wife who leaves the family, it is no longer a shame. Sometimes it is almost impossible to reach the modern Amazon. If she decides something for herself, it’s difficult to stop her.

— Inner freedom is good. But is the decision to burn bridges always the right one?

— I am probably a very conservative psychologist. Today independence and strength are promoted. However, it seems to me that we need to try to save the family to the last. You shouldn't make hasty conclusions. After all, you can regret it very much later, and it’s not always possible to get everything back.

A lot of people come to me, and I can say with complete confidence that children suffer the most from the separation of their parents.

These include psychological problems that accompany later in adulthood, and various diseases caused by severe nervous stress. And in adolescence, suicidal thoughts may even arise.

And these are not unfounded statements, but real situations that I, as a specialist, had to deal with. The psyche of children is quite flexible, but boys and girls aged 13-17 are extremely sensitive.

For 47 years the man carried within himself a tormenting feeling of abandonment

— Is it worth saving a marriage solely for the sake of children?

- If this is impossible, I always ask parents to at least try to maintain warm relations with each other. This is important for children.

Don’t swear, don’t find out in front of them who is right and who is wrong, try to come to some kind of compromise, because, as I already said, the situation of divorce greatly hurts boys and girls.

If you do not pay attention to this in time, the pain will torment a person throughout his life.

Just recently I talked with a woman who is already 47 years old. Her dad left the family when she was little. This is how the situation developed. She did not see her father. I decided to do this only now. I found out the address and visited my parent, who had long since moved to Moscow.

The meeting turned out to be very warm. The father was glad for his daughter’s arrival, he showed her the capital and told her about his fate. The woman admitted that she only now realized: all her life she felt inferior. And only now she felt better.

For almost 47 years the man carried within himself a tormenting feeling of abandonment.

• — Have there been any cases in your practice when people regretted getting divorced?
• — I ask about this, and usually a positive answer to this question is given by people who are well over 35.  
• - What is the main reason?
• — A relationship on the side that the partner could not forgive, even if it was actually something not serious at all.
• I only know three good reasons for divorce
• — How do you understand that a divorce is really necessary, because there are such situations?

— So that you understand better, I’ll tell you a little story. Back in the Soviet Union, I read a letter from a woman in a very serious magazine. This was a kind of message to all people. She wrote about her life. The narrator had a wonderful family: a good husband and two children, peace and quiet.

But the woman began to notice that her husband began to move away - he devoted all his free time only to the kids. At some point, the wife began to ask questions. The husband honestly answered that she was very dear to him and he respected her immensely, but... only as the mother of their children, it turned out that he fell in love with another.

The woman cried, was offended, cursed. He endured and did not make excuses. The man was very attached to the children; he could not leave his family. Yes, his wife internally did not let him go. Slowly and painfully, the realization came to her that a person dear to her was simply dying before her eyes. A conversation took place and they parted.

Without waiting for the morning, he took some things and rushed towards his dream. However, he was in such a hurry that he lost control and crashed. In an instant, hope and support for everyone disappeared. In the letter, she asked not to repeat her mistake, but to understand and accept the feelings of another and, no matter how painful it may be, to let go.

What is this story for? Love is the most important reason . If you feel that they are not lying to you, that a serious feeling is forcing a person to leave, then you need to come to terms with it.

The second reason is any human addiction , be it alcohol, drugs, or gambling addiction. If a person is not ready to fight with himself, it is impossible to pull him out of the swamp, no matter how hard his spouse tries, he will have to drown together. Here I have a rather tough position, because this is true. Too many broken destinies. There are no former people with addictions.

The third reason is violence. I think everyone understands this. Don't wait for the aggressor to eventually cripple you physically or mentally. Pack your things, seek help, support and leave. There are always options.

It seems to me that there are three main factors. In all other cases, I advise you not to rush into a decision.

Take off your rose-colored glasses!

“Maybe you should ask yourself some questions to better understand what’s going on in your soul?”

— Without going to a psychologist, you can go through projective techniques for unfinished sentences on the topic “Family Relationships.” In them you just need to finish the saying. It is advisable to do this together, and then exchange the results obtained; they will surprise both. Only I recommend turning to serious psychological sites.  

When we get married, we often confuse expectations with reality, endowing our partner with non-existent qualities, perceiving his behavior from a position that is convenient for us at a given moment in time. And as experience shows, taking off the “rose-colored glasses” and seeing a person from a different angle is very painful.

If partners simply decide to talk to each other, this is already a serious step forward! I take my hat off to people like that. Unfortunately, more and more often couples come to me where he or she demands in an almost commanding tone: “Explain to my husband (wife) what he (she) must do!” Such statements have long ceased to amaze me.

And if we change, then only together.

One more little sketch. I often watch people. What can you do, that's the job. So I remember one scene well (although it is repeated more than once in other interpretations). In the underground. The train arrived. A young couple at the station says goodbye.

He kissed her and she walked forward. At the very doors of the transport, the girl turned around to look at the guy. But the young man had already taken out his phone and buried his nose in it. Not a very pleasant situation, you will agree.

The girl never received the message she was hoping for.

It would seem nonsense! But it is in the little things that the truth can be seen. I can predict future relationships between people based on this story alone. And my verdict will be discouraging. The relationship is at the initial stage, but already here it is worth asking yourself whether this is the right person and whether we really need each other.

Freedom is too tempting

— Today it is fashionable to say “we took a break” when a couple decided to separate for a while and live separately. Is this method useful?

- I guess, yes. However, there is one thing. Freedom can be too tempting. Primarily for men.

Why do problems start in marriage? There are no obligations during the candy-bouquet period. Today we met, went to the cinema, and tomorrow we decided to relax. There are more positive emotions, and it’s too early to make any complaints.

And then you have to be with the person constantly, overcome obstacles together, get used to each other. And for some this is extremely difficult. So it is here. If you feel the taste of freedom again, there is a tantalizing desire to fly away forever.

When the wave of joy from independence subsides, it may turn out that this freedom was not really needed.

— Can you give advice on saving a marriage?

- Tell each other about your shortcomings. When I tell my clients this, their eyes widen. And yet, yes, let a man honestly say that from time to time he throws socks all over the apartment, that he doesn’t know how to hang frames on the walls, and so on, and a woman admits that she only knows how to cook scrambled eggs, and sometimes gets upset over little things.

Taking off the mask of ideality, we begin to move towards each other. Before marriage, both men and women often idealize their partner and expect a certain attitude in advance, but then it turns out that everything is not as beautiful as it was in their dreams.

In any situation, try to conduct a dialogue, not a verbal duel, put yourself in your partner’s place, think, then act. This does not always save the marriage, but, believe me, it will preserve your nerves and respect for each other.

1. Photo: Anna Ivanova
3. “Most often, a wife leaves her husband because he is greedy and calculating.” Interview with a psychologist
4. “Don’t abuse children’s trust”: a psychologist gives advice to Sunday dads and moms
5. Sexuality does not depend on age, it is subject to nature. Interview with a psychologist

How to divorce your husband if you have a child - divorce your husband if you have children

By the way: Do you know about our “Stress-Free Divorce” service? More details

The question of how and where to divorce your husband if you have a child is clear, but very difficult, and we are talking not only about its legal component, but also about its moral one. It is very difficult for a child to understand why his two closest people do not want to live together anymore.

It’s easier when the husband is a tyrant and an alcoholic, because in this case the child will probably be able to understand and, probably, accept the mother’s decision. But when a child has developed a good relationship with his father throughout his short life, it is very difficult for him to understand why he cannot live with his father.

And, perhaps, despite all the worries of adults in this case, it is children who become the main victim of the current circumstances.

In the current situation, the process is greatly complicated and delayed! Therefore, we strongly recommend that you enlist the support of our lawyers! We will solve your problems turnkey! Take care of yourself and your children! Call us, we will help + 7 (495) 722-99-33.

Where can I divorce my husband if I have a child?

The impending separation, to some extent, frightens the divorcing couple a little. The situation is further complicated by the presence of a common minor child in their family. If the spouses did not have children during their marriage, divorce occurs without any problems. To dissolve a marriage, it is enough to come to the registry office and submit the necessary application.

But if the divorcing spouses have children, the decision on divorce will be made only by the court.

Unlike the situation when a man initiates a divorce, a woman is absolutely free to choose the time of divorce.

• If there is no dispute about the children, the spouse must file an application for divorce in the Magistrates' Court;
• If agreement about children with your husband is not reached, you should contact the district court.

To get a divorce as quickly as possible, you must indicate in your application:

• How long have you been married to the defendant;
• Does your family have a joint child or several children;
• Which parent will the child live with after the divorce? If there are several of them, will the children be separated?
• What is the reason for divorce.

Read more about the procedure for divorce in the presence of minor children here.

It should be taken into account that after a child reaches the age of ten, according to the law, he can, during a court hearing, express his opinion on the issue of his further residence with one of the parents.

Divorce without husband's consent if there is a child

To dissolve a marriage in the presence of a child and on the initiative of the wife in cases where the husband does not agree with the divorce, you need to contact:

• To the magistrate's court, if there is no dispute about the children;
• To the district court, if the claim seeks to determine the child’s place of residence.

Read more about divorce in the absence of the consent of one of the spouses here.

Practice shows that a husband’s disagreement with a divorce most often threatens a dispute about the children.

When one of the spouses is against ending the marriage relationship, the judge will most likely give the parties time, but no more than three months, to think about the situation and possible reconciliation. If at the end of the specified period reconciliation has not taken place, the couple will be divorced without problems, even if one of them does not agree to the divorce.

What to do if the husband wants to take the child away during a divorce?

Firstly, a husband does not have the right to simply “take away” a child after a divorce - this issue will be decided by the court.

Secondly, in a court hearing, each parent has equal rights to the child and only the court has the right to make a final verdict, taking into account their financial situation; the child’s attachment to each parent; personal characteristics of father and mother, etc.

What to do if your husband threatens to take your child away? — Apply to the court with a demand for divorce and determination of the child’s place of residence.

If the child is being held by the father by force, against the will of the mother and without an appropriate court decision (or contrary to one that has already been made), contact law enforcement agencies and the prosecutor’s office.

• about its material content. Spouses, before the start of the trial, can agree among themselves on voluntary monetary payments for child support, but if this does not happen, then the spouse must submit an application for alimony.

The issue of alimony is resolved through the court even if the father is in prison, despite the fact that if there is a spouse serving a prison sentence, it is possible to divorce the children through the registry office.

• about the child’s place of residence, which parent he will stay with;
• about the order of communication between the second parent and the child: the number and frequency of meetings, their duration, the possibility of monitoring the upbringing, etc.

Unlike divorce on the initiative of the husband (Article 17 of the RF IC), a wife has no restrictions on the right to demand a divorce from her husband if she has a one-month-old child or a child under 3 years of age.

• According to the norms of the Family Code, after the divorce, a man will be obliged to pay alimony not only for the child, but also for his mother, who is on maternity leave.
• Divorce from a husband with a one-month-old child is carried out according to the general rules established for divorce with children: through the magistrates' court.
• The question of determining the child’s place of residence, of course, can be raised in a lawsuit, but the practice in these cases is clear - the infant will be left with the mother in any case.

Divorce from husband if there are two children

If during their married life the spouses have two children, the divorce procedure does not change at all. The spouses or the court may decide to divide the children for further residence between the father and mother.

This point must be reflected in the statement of claim. According to current legislation, parents have equal rights to their children.

When making a final decision on this issue, the court will definitely take into account all the pros and cons.

How to divorce your husband if you have three or more children

What to do during a divorce if there are three or more children in the family?

A divorce from a husband with three or more children is no different from a divorce with two children. The court still decides questions about which parent a particular child will remain with and has the right to both divide the children between the parents and determine their place of residence with one of them.

During the court hearing, special attention will be paid to the attachment of each of the children to each of the parents, the children's ability to self-care and their need for the care of each of the parents. It is clear that younger children are most likely to be left with their mother, while a child of school and high school age may be left with their father.

How to get a divorce if the child's father is not listed on the certificate?

Often women are faced with the problem of how to file for divorce if there is a child, but his father is not included in the birth certificate. This happens when a child was born before marriage, and the parents formalized the relationship only after his birth.

In this case, it will also not be possible to quickly divorce without a trial if one of the spouses declares in court that they have a joint child, and in order to further receive alimony, it is necessary to establish paternity and only then go to court to collect it.

Specialists from ICPI “Planet of Law” are ready to take on divorce proceedings of any complexity, including those complicated by additional questions regarding the fate of children, alimony, division of property, etc. As part of the comprehensive service “Divorce without the presence of spouses in court,” all your problems will be resolved with minimal presence of you and your child in court. Call right now + 7 (495) 722-99-33.

How to divorce your husband if you have a child: the procedure for dissolving a marriage in court with or without the spouse’s consent to divorce

In this situation, you first need to decide where to contact: the civil registry office, the district court or the magistrate. The process itself will take from one to three months .

To protect maternity, divorce in the presence of a child under one year old is impossible without the initiative of the wife. In addition, deferment and installment payment of state fees is possible. According to statistics, the vast majority of children are abandoned by their mothers, but sometimes it makes sense to play it safe and prepare evidence in your favor.

Where does a divorce from a husband occur if there are children?

When divorcing your husband, there are three authorities that you can contact in order to carry out this procedure : the civil registry office, the magistrate, and the district court .

Civil registry offices

A rather convenient option, its advantage is that there is no need to obtain the husband’s consent to divorce, even if there are common minor children, and the terms are much shorter.

The downside is that the use of this option is possible only in a limited number of cases: under Art.

19 of the Family Code (FC) of the Russian Federation, divorce can be effected through the registry office at the request of even one spouse if:

It is important to note that only a spouse who does not belong to such categories can apply to the registry office with such an application. The application is submitted at the place of residence of one of the spouses or at the place of marriage registration, which is quite convenient.

The application will need to be accompanied by: a document confirming your identity; Marriage certificate; a court decision confirming your right to divorce through the registry office (a court verdict convicting your husband for more than 3 years is not suspended, a court decision declaring your husband missing or incompetent), a receipt for payment of the state duty.

The review period will be 1 month.

This time is used to notify interested parties (guardians or managers of the husband’s property or himself in prison), and the establishment of a one-month period is aimed at ensuring that there is an opportunity to change one’s mind and comprehend everything. Upon expiration of the period, the marriage is dissolved and you can receive a certificate of divorce.

World judge

The process of divorce in court is longer, it will be necessary to submit additional documents and evidence, in addition, the judge has the right to apply a conciliation procedure, which will drag out the process up to 3 months .

If you have children, you will need the child's birth certificate. You cannot do without the husband’s notarized consent to divorce if he does not want to be present at the court hearing, but agrees to the divorce.

But if termination through the registry office is impossible, then a lawsuit cannot be avoided.

The magistrate will consider the case if:

District Court

He will consider all other cases (not within the competence of the registry office or magistrates). Those. if the husband does not want to consent to divorce, the spouses have joint disputed property, or there is a dispute about children.

Example

Anatoly P. and Veronica N. got married in 2004, they have common children aged 8 and 9 years. As a result of the discord in the relationship, Anatoly P. decided to get a divorce, to which his wife agreed.

Even before the trial, they resolved the issue of dividing jointly acquired property and alimony, and also determined that the common children would live with their mother. When the trial began, the husband changed his mind about leaving the children with his wife and filed claims for the children. As a result, the case was not within the jurisdiction of the magistrate.

The judge made a ruling and referred the case to the district court, where the case was resolved in favor of the wife.

The procedure for divorcing a husband if there are children

After you have filed a claim in court, you must wait for notification of the time and place of consideration. As a rule, it arrives 10-16 days from the day the claim was filed.

• If there is still no notification during this time, then it is worth going to court and finding out the reasons for this (sometimes the application is left without progress).
• If everything is in order with the claim, in 1 month there will be a trial (the period is counted from the date of filing the application).

You can either personally participate in the meeting or send a request to have the case considered without you. The defendant has the right to file an objection to the claim or admit it.

• It is important to note that it is impossible to dissolve a marriage if the wife is pregnant or has a child under 1 year of age , the same applies to the death or loss of a child within the specified period.
• There are a number of features when you have a child under 3 years of age . Before the child is 3 years old, the woman remains on maternity leave and, accordingly, has no opportunity to earn money, which gives rise to the husband’s obligation to pay alimony not only for the child but also for the spouse while she is on maternity leave.
• A similar rule exists for a disabled child (group 1 since childhood), but in this case, alimony must be paid to the wife caring for this child until he comes of age.

If there is a dispute about children, the process may drag on for a period of 1 to 3 months. This is due to the fact that you need to determine who to leave the child with, find out the arguments of the spouses and the child himself (if he is over 10 years old ). A psychological examination of the child is often necessary (it is used to determine the degree of attachment to each parent).

There are frequent cases of involving the guardianship and trusteeship authorities in the judicial process. They examine the living conditions of the husband and wife, find out whether their home meets the standards and whether it is possible for children to live here. The court will take this examination into account when resolving the dispute.

If the spouses have reached a compromise on the fate of the children, they can enter into a settlement agreement. It indicates the place of residence of the child after the divorce, and may additionally stipulate the issue of alimony, the procedure for communicating with the child, and others. However, the court may not approve the agreement if it considers that it is contrary to the interests of the children.

Example

A settlement agreement was drawn up regarding this. During the process, the children stated that they did not want to live separately. The court decided to refuse to approve the settlement agreement and ordered a psychological examination, which confirmed the harm of separating the twins and established that their psychological attachment to their mother is stronger.

Based on this, the court decided to leave the children with their mother.

If there is no unanimity in the decision on who to leave the child with, the court itself will make a decision. The judge will take into account the personal qualities of the spouses, their income, health, living conditions, the child’s affection and other facts.

The court must find out whether the defendant consents to termination . If there is one, then the divorce process will speed up.

But if the defendant is in favor of preserving the family, the judge must find out the reasons for the divorce and determine whether it is possible to preserve the family relationship. In addition, the judge can give a period of up to 3 months for reconciliation .

If the plaintiff does not give up his idea, the claim is satisfied and the marriage is dissolved.

The court's decision in this case will come into force after 1 month; in case of an appeal, the decision will come into force after the case is considered by the court of appeal. Then you need to contact the registry office, which will issue you a certificate of divorce.

Application to court for divorce

A statement of claim for divorce is filed in a magistrate or district court. It is possible for the plaintiff to draw it up himself, but a good option would also be to contact a lawyer or family law lawyer.

Other demands can be added to the claim for divorce (about alimony for children or wife, about determining the place of residence and the order of communication with the child, about the division of jointly acquired property).

The application itself is submitted at the place of residence (registration) of the husband or the last known one. But there are a number of cases in which an application can be submitted at the place of registration of the plaintiff:

• If you are raising children who have not reached the age of majority and live with you.
• Serious health problems of the plaintiff.
• Consent of both spouses.

There are a number of requirements for the statement of claim; it must contain:

• Details of the district court or magistrate.
• Addresses (both actual and official), telephones, e-mails of spouses.
• Information about marriage (date and place).
• Date of termination of cohabitation.
• Information about children and the existence of a dispute about them.
• The presence of the husband's consent to divorce.
• Reasons for divorce.
• The very demand for divorce.
• Requirements for division of property (if any).
• Child support requirements (if any).
• List of attached documents.
• Date and your signature.

The following must be attached to the claim:

• A copy and original of the marriage certificate (its conclusion). If it is missing, you need to contact the registry office where the marriage was registered so that you can be issued a duplicate certificate.
• A copy and original of the child's birth certificate.
• A receipt that confirms that the state fee has been paid.
• If the spouses want to divorce, a written consent to divorce is required, which must be certified by a notary.
• Information about the income of family members and documents confirming them (if there is a dispute about alimony).
• If the husband and wife have decided on the amount of alimony, then an agreement on it certified by a notary.
• Marriage agreement (contract), if any.
• Inventory of property and documents for its assessment, in case of a dispute about property.
• other documents relevant to the case.

The package of documents must be as complete as possible , in this case the case is processed without delay and much faster. If something is missing, the judge has the right not to proceed with the case, of which the plaintiff will be notified. The court will provide time to correct the shortcomings. If the plaintiff does not meet the deadline, the application and all attached documents will be returned to him.

State fee for divorce in court

When you divorce your husband, the law requires you to pay a state fee. In case of divorce through the court (without division of property), you will have to pay a state fee of 650 rubles for filing a claim .

It is important to note that even during a trial, it is necessary to pay the state fee to the civil registry office, i.e. another 650 rubles for each copy of the divorce certificate. Which adds up to 1950, and this does not include the cost of hired lawyers.

When dividing joint property, in addition to the standard fee, you must additionally pay for the division of property and this amount will depend on the total value of your property.

The minimum state duty for the division of property will be 400 rubles, and in general it will be calculated according to the following formula :

• within 20,000 rubles - 4% of the claim price, but at least 400 rubles;
• 20,001 - 100,000 rubles - 800 rubles + 3% of the claim price exceeding 20,000 rubles;
• 100,001 - 200,000 rubles - 3,200 rubles + 2% of the claim price exceeding 100,000 rubles;
• 200,001 - 1,000,000 rubles - 5,200 rubles + 1% of the claim price exceeding 200,000 rubles;
• more than 1,000,000 rubles - 13,200 rubles + 0.5% of the claim price exceeding 1,000,000 rubles, but the total amount does not exceed 60,000 rubles. Those. you will not pay more than this amount even if the value of the assets is more than a billion rubles

Example

Family T. After 10 years of marriage they decided to get a divorce.

They have a common child aged 5 years, an apartment (the market value of which is 800,000 rubles), a bank account in the amount of 200,000 rubles and a LADA Kalina car (valued at 150,000 rubles).

In this case, the state fee when filing a claim will be 19,600 rubles = 650 rubles + 13,200 rubles + (800,000+ 200,000 + 150,000)* 0.5%.

The issue of paying the state fee is very important; without paying it, the judge may leave the application without progress , and in case of non-payment, he will return the application and your documents to you.

As a rule, judges are ready to accommodate a woman who does not work and is raising children.

To confirm her position, the wife should provide certificates of income, the presence of dependents and other documents confirming expenses and the impossibility of timely and full payment of the state fee.

Can a child stay with his father after a divorce?

Statistics in Russia say that a child is left with his father only in 5% of cases. This is due to mentality and the fact that, as a rule, the child’s psychological and emotional attachment to his mother is greater.

But there are also opposite cases. In order for the child to be guaranteed to remain with the mother, it is necessary :

• Do not sign documents agreeing that the child will live with the father.
• Get an opinion from the guardianship and trusteeship authority stating that it is preferable for the child to live with the mother
• Bring certificates of income and their regularity, confirm the ability to provide the child with necessary things (clothing, food treatment, education, entertainment)
• Provide positive recommendations and characteristics ;
• Bring to your advantage the fact that other relatives (grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc.) will help in upbringing;
• Find out your child's point of view (if he has reached 10 years old, the court will ask his opinion). The desire to live with mom is a powerful argument
• Present arguments that compromise the father before the court. (drink and drug abuse, bad habits, serious illnesses, lack of housing, etc.). In this case, evidence is needed that will convince the court that you are not slandering.

It is important to present to the court evidence that will convince him that you are right:

• Testimony from the mother herself with convincing arguments;
• Documentary evidence from the place of work or from government agencies;
• Witness statements;
• Forensic psychological examination;
• conclusions of guardianship authorities;
• income documents;
• documents indicating the degree of participation in the lives of children;
• video shooting, photographs.

Based on this, the court will decide with whom to leave the child. If the mother manages to collect all these documents and evidence, then the likelihood that the court will give the child to the father is extremely low.

Questions from our readers and answers from a consultant

My husband decided to get a divorce and filed a petition for divorce. At the same time, he indicated that we agreed to get a divorce and were not ready to try to save the family. In fact, I am against this. Plus, we have a child together. What should be included in an objection to a claim?

In your objection, you must indicate in detail the reasons for not wanting a divorce and point out the possibility of preserving the family, while it is good to refer to the presence of a common child and his interests. In this case, the court may give you 3 months for reconciliation.

Do I need to have copies of the statement of claim certified by a notary if I send them to another city where the defendant lives?

No, the statement of claim is not certified by anyone, you just need to correctly draw up the date and put your signature.

I am divorcing my husband, we have three children (4, 6 and 8 years old). I would like to know what the differences will be from a divorce if there is one child.

In fact, the differences are not so significant. The amount of alimony will vary: one child is entitled to one-fourth of earnings or income, and for three children it is already half.